The Bird is the Word

When I was a student at St. Kate's, there was this bird that would constantly chirp in the mornings during the fall and spring. I don't know what kind of bird it is (that's definitely not my area of expertise) but it had a two-tone chirp, almost like a whistle, "doo-doo", with one of the 'doos' higher in pitch than the other. It started early in the morning, and just kept going. Same 2 notes, over and over again. I would lay in bed some mornings and wish so hard that it would go find another student to wake up. I swear, it just sat in the tree outside of my window tweeting until I finally got out of bed and got going with my day. When I got married and moved into an apartment close by, I could still hear it. I figured it had its own territory that covered where I was living or maybe it was a different bird that lived in the same area. After moving into a different apartment and still hearing this bird, I became convinced that I have a bird stalker. It has followed me to every apartment I have lived in. Including my current one. I first heard it a couple of weeks ago, back from its winter away in some tropical location, taunting me that it found me once again and letting me know it's back and not going anywhere.

Now, I know what you are thinking, "ok Emily, maybe you are a little crazy, don't you think it could be a different bird of the same species"? Sure, that sounds reasonable, only it's not. This bird makes the exact same noise, same 2 notes, same pitch, same exact sound. Now, like I said, I'm not a bird expert, but don't birds of the same species sound even a little bit different? I would suspect the answer is yes. No, the only reasonable conclusion is that this bird found me at St. Kate's, developed an unreasonable fondness (or hatred, more likely) for me, and has since followed me from apartment to apartment. The worst part is, I've never even seen this bird. I have no idea what kind of bird it is, what it looks like, how big it is, or anything. I only know what it sounds like. It's an experienced stalker, obviously, getting close but not too close to its victim. And there's nothing I can do about it. Clearly, moving does not help.

I suppose there are worse things to have stalking me (a person, for starters) and luckily I now rise early enough in the morning that it doesn't wake me up or annoy me as I'm trying to fall back asleep. Maybe now that it knows that it can go find someone else to bother.